Monday, October 26, 2009

To All The Coaches...

If you are a coach, you MUST read this, you will understand...hilarious! LOVE IT!

There is a thread on the JJ Huddle volleyball website in Ohio that is titled "I can't stand my daughter's coach." It has been pretty sad/funny with parents writing in talking about how bad some of their kid's coaches are. Coaches are writing in about how bad the parents are. Here is what one coach finally sent in. Pretty funny.

-I've been a coach for two decades and I want to let everyone here know...the PARENTS are right.

- I don't like your daughter.....so I put her on the bench.

- Your daughter IS better than all of the rest of my players, but I enjoy losing, so I put her on the bench.

- I definitely have favorites, your daughter is not one of them, in fact I hate her because she is so much better than the rest of the team that I am envious.

- Every loss is DEFINITELY my fault seeing that in practice I intentionally teach your daughter to shank balls, hit balls in the net, actively not communicate, serve balls out of bounds, and set a ball to a different location every time we touch it.

- It is also MY FAULT that your daughter is slow, fat, uncoordinated, short, lathargic, can't jump, and is completely un-athletic. I now realize it has ALWAYS been my responsibility to teach your daughter how to be an elite athlete despite YOUR poor gene pool.

- I am such an idiot for not realizing that everybody and everything in the world IS fair.

- I recently became sooooo much better as a coach because I began listening to all the feedback that the parents had to give me.....I don't know why I didn't listen to all of them a long time ago....my job would have been so much easier.

- I am so mean for holding your daughter accountable and responsible.What a jerk I am....I mean, how did it take me so long to realize it is NEVER your daughters fault....if all my other players would just get things right they would stop holding your daughter back from reaching her potential....I totally see that now!

- My mistake....I should definitely have kept your 5'3 daughter in the front row to block against the 6'3 outside hitter. If you had just told me the story about how she blocked that really big girl from Rhode Island at a YMCA Camp sooner, I would have known.

- I now realize what an idiot I am for benching your daughter for getting called for 7 ball handling errors....everybody knows that high school officials don't know a good setter when they see one....I should have definitely been more supportive and given her more of a chance....my mistake!

- Thank God your daughter is on my team to compensate for all my coaching deficiencies. She is TOTALLY responsible for the matches that we have won, and I now see that all our losses are due to my incompetence.

.- I am definately crippled as a coach.....I don't know why I haven't asked for your help sooner....I am sure you know bad coaching when you see it....I mean, your wealth of experience as Wal-Mart Manager speaks for itself.

By the way, have you "liked" my Worthy of the Prize Sports Ministries facebook page? We are at 800 fans! At 1000, there will be a BIG giveaway! Please "like" our page to help our ministry grow!

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